One week from now I will be frantically combing the room for the remote so I can turn on the tv and soak in the inane ramblings of Lee Corso and the immaculately coiffed hair of one Kirk Herbstreit in the noisy, frenetic circus that is ESPN College Gameday.
One week from now I will watch all two hours delicately blended with heartwarming stories, egregious game predictions, and masterful signs bearing vulgar insults veiled only slightly enough to get past the words police.
One week from now I will not give a crap which mascot head Lee Corso puts on, which, as like a groundhog's shadow, is a completely useless predictor of anything. But I will make sure I don't miss it anyway.
One week from now I will watch the games that come on at 11 am, which will no doubt be either Major School vs. Cupcake or ACC vs. Big East (not sure which is less entertaining), but it will not matter one bit.
One week from now I will sort through an array of crimson garments, analyzing them for their previous luck history to luck needed ratio, conduciveness to pre-game and game-time weather conditions, and general appearance.
One week from now I will take my seat hours early in "The House that Bud Built" (shoutout 2007 intro vid) . My face will likely turn as crimson as my aforementioned apparel, and I will probably look like some rabid, sweat-covered creature. But I won't care at all, and as the blistering heat gives way to refreshing night air (which I won't fully be ably to enjoy packed in standing room only with 85k of my bffs) I won't even notice.
One week from now I will inspect the team as they sit in their warm-up formation... do they look excited? Fresh? Ready to dominate? I will feel that rush of thrill, and the ever-closeness of the game as they get pumped up and exit the field to Ozzy's Crazy Train.
One week from now I will scream like crazy when the pride takes the field and the drumline gives their one little dun da-dun and I will stare in amazement as the drum major struts so impossibly low (and trust me I have made attempts). I will get pseudo-annoyed when the crowd gets off the clapping beat of that time-honored rendition of "You're a Grand Ole Flag," but by this point, it has essentially become part of the pre-game experience.
One week from now I will literally get goosebumps as the new intro video plays for the first time. I will scream my brains out when my favorite players say the things that purposely pander to a loyal crowd. I will cheer extra loud for any mentions of Bob Stoops, Sam Bradford, National Championships or Heisman trophies, because that is what Sooner fans do.
I will try to match my pitch (or maybe attempt to harmonize) with the crowd as I proudly hold my "one" up in the air and chant the "OooooooooooooooooU" and pray in that opening instant that our special teams will be good this year. But moreso, I will feel the thrill of the realization that it's finally Football Tiiiiiiime in Ok-la-homaaaaaa.
I will stand the entire game. I will yell "Oooooo" when we are on defense. I will try to help quiet the clueless while we are on offense. I will cherish every touchdown and accompanying fanfare (firework, Sooner Schooner run, and playing of Boomer Sooner). I will half-heartedly listen to any non-football related words being spoken to me while the game is in play, and if the game is close, I will zero-heartedly listen.
I will end my night satisfied in a Sooner victory in the chasefor8, or (heaven forbid) I will be completely morose and crestfallen in the agony of defeat. Either way, I will want to analyze the big plays and the details and the new players and everything else in between. I will talk about how that night's play may bode for the rest of the season. I will run to the nearest TV to see highlights from the other big games around the country that I missed. I will want to catch ESPN's highlights of our game, even though I have just witnessed it in person.
In one week all of the pre-season speculation and polls and hypothesizing go out the window. In one week football is here and back and for four precious months, Saturdays are a most magnificent experience. One week.