Golden Globes '11

So this year, I didn't catch one stitch of the Golden Globes. But judging from the responses on the internets, it was kind of an uncomfortable experience. But forget about that, let's talk about the fashion...which, unlike last year's mediocrity, did not disappoint! Dresses ranged from mega-fabulous to uber-trainwreck, which is just the way I likes it.

I'll start with the bad, since I like to end on a good note.

We'll begin with what I like to call the "Jilted Lovers" series. This year has not been kind to some of the ladies in Hollywood when it comes to their love lives... a fact that seemed to manifest itself in their red carpet wear. Yoikes.

Poor Scarjo... I'd be bummed if I was divorcing Ryan Reynolds, too. She just looks so matronly. Her dress would actually look pretty if she looked more fresh from the neck up. You can have a nice dress... but it's all in how you work it. And with this look, Advantage: Ryan Reynolds.

Saaaaaandyyyy can't you seeeee... you look like a miseryyyyyy. Now, Sandra Bullock is not known for her savvy style choices to begin with. But again, I actually think the dress is pretty great. It follows the neutral tone theme that seemed to dominate the night and incorporated a modest amount of sparkle. But the hair...ugh! Those bangs make her look so dowdy. She has one of the most beautiful faces in the world, why on earth would you want to pull focus from that? Advantage: Sandra Bullock, because no matter how messy she looks, she's still better than that creepy Jesse guy.

Ursula, is that you? This dress is just too much dress. It's too dark, and too engulfing. And the hair is too uptight. Another wronged woman gone awry. Advantage: slight, to Eva because Tony Parker is a pig and an idiot to be cheating on one of the most beautiful women in the world.

Now, onto the just plain bad. I won't even include Helena Bonham-Carter. That's part of her whole kooky, Bellatrix LeStrange (emphasis on Strange) shtick.

I feel like Michelle Williams was trying to harken back to the Dawson's Creek days with this outfit. I feel like this dress may have been acceptable circa 1997. I love florals as much as the next floral-loving gal, but daisies on a gunnysack? Just say no.

Somebody call Ebeneezer Scrooge, the Ghost of JLo's Career Past has come to haunt the Golden Globes. Seriously, with her catsuit-wearing, Idol-judging ways, she's become her own punchline, and it shows in her wardrobe and makeup choice. I know all those shows about vampires and witches are all very "now," but the apparition look has no place on the red carpet.

Aaah! This look harkens to mind the line, "Who's going to want you now, Aman-DUH?" (Coincidentally, Peter Facinelli was looking surprisingly unkempt himself at the Globes). The dress is very bridal (read: inappropriate), and the hair is creepy.

Speaking of creepy... Jayma Mays is such a beautiful woman with her standout red hair. But with this 'look,' it looks like she just got done watching a midnight showing of her "Rocky Horror Glee Show" episode. Morbid dress, overdone makeup, and uber-frail frame- what happened to our sweet Emma Pilsbury!? This look is so not deserving of John Stamos' scripted attention.

I truly think Halle Berry did this just to prove that she is, in fact human. The normally flawless Halle went all dominatrix on us with sparse and mismatching fabric. I really don't even understand what this dress is, or is supposed to be. It defies all logic and sensibility.

Again, I say, "Aaagh!" Xtina's tan is way off... she looks like a Madame Toussad's version of herself in this picture! The hair and makeup is poor and unflattering as well. The overly va-va-voom dress could be forgiven if not for the other misgivings.

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I feel many mixed emotions on Natalie Portman's look. I don't like her hair at all. And I don't know how to feel about that rose. I give her props for doing something different. It made her look matronly, but in the appropriate, I'm-having-a-baby kind of way. Don't love it, don't hate it.

Another pink dress. The dress itself is fine. But does anyone else see what I see? I redhead, gone blonde, gone alarmingly thin? Now she is a natural blonde, and it may be a bad camera angle, so I'm trying really hard to reserve judgement because I really like Emma Stone. I just don't want to see her go LiLo on us.

The looks I loved!

This is a prime example of working the dress. Olivia Wilde has the spunk to totally own this gown. I love the sparkle, and I love her sassy shoes. She looked young and fun, with a bit of edge.

Jayma Mays notwithstanding, the Glee cast looked stunning as usual. I love Jenna Ushkowitz's ruffled, romantic look. And that blue looks dynamic and beautiful.

I don't know if Mandy Moore is truly in the top echelons of "Best-Dressed," but I love her so I had to include her. She looks magnificent, and I love the color and unexpected neckline. Props!

Julie Bowen looks so much more glam here than the soccer mom she plays on Modern Family. The ruffles and pleating are just right, and I love the neutral color. It's fabulous, yet subtle. It's perfection.
Lea Michele certainly lives up to her diva moniker on the red carpet, and thank goodness she does. She always goes for the drama, which you have to have at an awards show. The pink is refreshing, and her hair matches the style of the dress elegantly.

Again with the neutral tones for Kaley Cuoco. I love it, because it doesn't overpower the construction of the dress; it allows you to admire and appreciate the details. I love the tiers on this dress. Very vintage, and yet it looks very modern at the same time.

Hailee Steinfeld looks like she could be straight out of a Clearasil ad. She looks fresh-faced and age-appropriate. And that is refreshing indeed. Note to Miley: simplicity is your ally- see above!

Ahh, another Glee fave. Neutral colors, but with sparkle, and a simple silouhette. It was the right dress for her. Excellent choice.

Dianna Agron, I swear never seems to get it wrong. There are so many ways to wear neutral and look fabulous, it's crazy. Her hair, makeup and jewels are really the compliments to this simple but elegant dress. Much better than the Cheerios uniform and rigid high ponytail.

And now in a jarring departure from all the neutrals, Catherine Zeta-Jones. Could she look any more regal and fabulous? The hair and earrings are wonderful, and the dress is just the perfect color, and the right amount of grandeur. She was the class of the Golden Globes.
Beautiful color, subtle sparkle, cinched waistline, fabulous man candy. I'm no Angie fan, but she looked undeniably awesome.

Now, you know I'm not really big on judging the menswear b/c it's boring, but I will leave you with one dapper young hottie to admire (read: drool over).

This is what we have to look forward to at the Oscars, people. Soak it in. Can't wait!!!